Last
Sunday(10th August), Dheeraj went shopping and I took kids to the fountain park where other
lady too, was visiting with her kids. We gathered there ,I sat with her chatting
and kids started playing. After sometime, Charvi came to me and pointing towards
a boy whom I could not locate, said, “mumma that boy patted me on my back and
said I love you”. In shock and surprise, I asked her to repeat and when she did
that loud, it was already heard by people nearby. I asked Charvi to ignore him
and go and play with her friends again. But the other lady, insisted her to say
the same thing again and then laughed off the entire thing saying, “ how sweet”…I
paused her there and said in a firm tone, “no, it’s not sweet or funny”. I didn’t
wanted Charvi to think about it either very seriously or very lightly. Though I
assured her that if I see that boy again or his parent, I’ll speak to them.
As She is growing up,I had been teaching Charvi about good
and bad touch, general acceptable and non acceptable gestures by others, but
never ever thought of discussing something like how to respond when someone
says I love you. Because till now, this is said only by family members to her
and she responds back akin. Well, her worried reaction to the boy’s words could
be because of the television exposure and my strict behavior. Although I am a very observant and
vigilant mother, I have given them very selective and restricted access to watching
television or cinema stuff, but still this generation you bet, is far beyond
our calculations and imaginations. Am sure she thought it was bad for a guy to
say something like this to a girl and that’s why she complained about it. It’s
a deal between me and my kids, that everything happening with them throughout
the day will be shared with me or their father or with both of us.
Would be too early to explain Charvi, what exactly the words
“ I love you” means and what importance it holds in life when said to a girl by
a boy. I presume, many years to go for her to take this education. Rest toh,
god know well! Although I am pretty sure, time will teach her lots of stuff in
its own way, but definitely, I will be there as her mentor, friend to help her
understand the difference between good and bad. To decide will be her onus.
After about an hour or so, my friend left the park for home,
and I sat there waiting for Dheeraj to join us and then head together home.
Charvi came to me again and said, “mumma, that boy came and said sorry, I will
never say or do such a thing to anyone else or you ever again”…well, I turned
curious this time and wanted to see that boy for sure and successfully I could
get a sight of him. I waited for a while to let him come nearby and them I waved
him a hand to call close. He came to me and this is how further conversation
took place…
Me: Hi
Him: Hi
Me: So, you were saying something to her(I pointed towards
Charvi)
Him: Nope
Me: Nope, I think you said something a while ago..!!
Him: Oh..Ohh. dat..yup..well…yes I said.. I love you
Me: okay, so do you know what does that mean?
Him: Pretty much, yes I know, but I said sorry to her, I won’t
say that again
Me: fair enough, but why did you say that in first place?
Him: Welllll..(with full on expression and assertion through
hands and pointing towards charvi)…look at her, just look at her, she is so
pretty!!
Me: Ahaa,, you think so?
Him: Of course, I do, don’t you?
Me: ( I was already amazed at the confidence of this young little
boy, by now got pretty sure, he had been
watching a lot of television)… Yes..I do, I know she is pretty.
Him: But I said sorry..
Me: Alright,Ok..well…are you from Moscow, Russia..are you Russian?
Him: yes I am
Me: you speak good English, people here don’t
Him: oh yea…my father wanted me to learn English, he taught
me a lot, and I do practice even now
Me: so how old are you?
Him: I ll be turning seven, I mean almost seven..tomorrow is
my birthday, would you like to join in?
Me: (hmmm!!)…No, not really!!
Him: I can tell you the way to my home. (and he explained
the entire route map to me with all the Russian names which I just cannot
remember)….There are two grandmothers and two grandfathers at home. They would
love to meet you and her (he meant Charvi, but he didn’t know the name and even
I didn't ask his name)
Me: So, your parents are here with you right now?
Him: No, only my mom, my dad doesn't live with us?
Me: Okey, so where does he live?
Him: He left us to live with another woman.
Me: (His acceptance with facts of life left me stunned)..okey..am
sorry about that.
Him: Don’t be, we are looking for another dad, hopefully we
should get one.
Me: (ohhoo..i thought, he is so clear and crisp on his
plans)..So you have siblings to play with?
Him: I have few brothers and sisters, but they don’t live
with us, they are my father’s children, donno how he got them, may be his
another wife gifted him.
Me: (By now, I had started feeling really bad for this cute
little boy…didn’t know whether and how to carry on or stop the conversation)
okkey…don’t worry, you have two pairs of grandparents to play with, cheer up
and celebrate your birthday tomorrow with fun and laughter.
Him: ohh no no no…they don’t play with me, they make me do
their stuff..oh how tiring that becomes at times. Never mind, thanks for your
wishes. I would like you to join in please with her (Charvi ) ofcourse!
Me: Sorry dear, we have some other things scheduled up, may
be some other time!
Him: Alright , I think it’s time to goo…see there’s my mom
calling me, oh my god..now she’s gonna scold me again (may be she scolded him
earlier too for saying those things)!!
Me: yup, bye..tc
Him: will see you again in this park someday if my mom
wishes to have supper at khachapuri..bye for now!!
Hmmmmm..!!!! Didn’t understand, if it was the outcome of the
culture and the fashion in which the boy was brought up, or it was an exception
that such a young boy was so confident and eloquent about small and big things
of life. I know, unlike India, things here are quite frank and open right from
the childhood, but as I had never encountered such conversation with a child
his age earlier, the experience left me speechless.
Well…..time to polish the lessons it seems, need to educate
my darling a little more than what I thought was enough given that she just
turned eight.
On the other hand, a vague thought chuckled me up…though the
thought is completely baseless and even more funnier..but still lemme share it …I was 13
when I first heard, “ I love you” from a guy..and my sweetheart didn't even
turn 8 by that day and such quandries….Uffff!!!....This generation, I tell you!! Toooo much!!
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